Leg

May 15, 2023
A man born with cerebral palsy reflects on his life. Essayist Marshall recounts his childhood in 1990s Utah as the middle sibling of five "in a rowdy family where someone was always almost dying or OD-ing." His father managed a small community newspaper group, and his mother wrote an inspirational column called "Silver Linings" while enduring debilitating cancer treatments and years of remissions and recurrences. Marshall walked with a perpetual limp, documented in his mother's columns, and he underwent numerous therapies, surgeries, and recovery bouts in wheelchairs. In an effort to somehow shield their son from ridicule, however, his parents kept his cerebral palsy diagnosis a secret throughout his childhood, calling his chronic limp a nagging case of "tight tendons." In a zesty, forthright series of humorous, heartfelt, and often wincingly oddball anecdotes, Marshall shares how his hypochondriacal family "leaned into" all of "life's curveballs." Brotherly boyhood shenanigans involving a back massager introduced him to masturbation, and at the same time, he nurtured a simmering fondness for other boys and struggled with HIV/AIDS education ("Did everyone know I was gay? Was this lesson for me? These other assholes weren't going to get AIDS, but I was"). In the second half, Marshall chronicles his coming out as a disabled gay man, acknowledging life with CP, and navigating the nuances of first impressions, intimacy, and forgiveness for his parents. Marshall was 30 when he accidentally confirmed his CP diagnosis after uncovering one of his mother's columns exposing "the Watergate tapes of my childhood, revealing both crime and cover-up." The author, who confesses that "my cerebral palsy has made me see my life, and my leg, with renewed appreciation," displays a natural storytelling ability, and he writes with a good dose of self-effacing humor, exposing the murky consequences of secrets, even when they're kept with the best intentions. A sparkling portrait of personal discovery and a celebration of family, forgiveness, and thriving with a disability.

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